Nigerian man David Ukre became talk of town when himself and his partner Eric T. Shoen took their love life to another level by getting married in New York July 30th.
Much hasn’t been heared from them since that time.
The husband has since opened up to Huffington Post on their wedding. What he revealed below:
We tried very carefully to make sure this wouldn’t happen. Guests were instructed not to take photos during the ceremony. We were very particular about who was invited. It was a sad added bonus that most of the guests from Nigeria cancelled just 24 hours before the ceremony.
On July 30, I married a Nigerian man. Although he is very special to me, he is not famous. He has never done anything to warrant so much media coverage. We had a small ceremony under the leaves of some great old trees on the lawn of an adorable little restaurant. My family and our closest friends joined us. Our vow exchange was only 30 minutes long.
What followed was a day of love, laughter, joy, eating, sore feet, kids running circles around the yard, and family and friends celebrating our day together. We posted only a few photos to our Facebook pages and asked guests to not post photos or mention our marriage.
That night, we went out dancing to a club with friends who stayed over. The next morning, we decided to take some friends with us on the first day of our honeymoon to see Niagara Falls. We were still enjoying every moment of calling each other husband, taking photos kissing in front of the falls, getting sprayed at the Cave of the Winds, and accepting well wishing texts from family and friends.
Monday morning, I woke up early to return the rental car that we had used for the weekend. When I returned, my husband was pacing and crying, distraught, pointing to his phone. Somehow, someone had either sold or given photos from our wedding and first dance to one of Nigeria’s notorious gossip bloggers, Linda Ikeji who chose to publish them on her blog. Whether to out David and make a mockery or to somehow use it as advocacy, no one knows. What we do know is that she had no permission from either of us to use our photos or story.
My husband calls me “the fixer” for a reason. I felt like I might be able to fix this before it got out of control. I called my sister who is an attorney for advice. Given that the information was posted on an international site, there was little we could do. My friends at Google and Blog-spot, and attorneys who are friends of mine gave me the same unfortunate news. Mind you, this is all happening at 6:30 a.m. on a Monday morning. Friends from all over the USA messaged me as soon as I posted on my Facebook for some assistance.
I did contact the blogger directly via email and asked that the photos of our wedding, of our trip with my family, photos of our groomsmen, and direct quotes from my Facebook page be removed. I quickly locked down the security on my Facebook which had been relatively open so that I could use it for advertising and sales. I never heard back from her.
At 7:00 a.m. I got a call from my twin brother, who is my best friend:
J: “Eric, which blog are you talking about?”
Me: “There should only be one”
J: “It’s already on at least a dozen blogs.”I had to tell David at this point that there was little I could do. At the same time, his phone and my phone started to heat up with Facebook messages from strangers condemning us for being gay. His phone started to ring continuously from unknown Nigerian phone numbers.
I felt lost. I still get a terrible feeling in my stomach just a week and a half later. I hate being helpless. How could our tiny, personal wedding in Rochester mean so much to hateful people on the other side of the planet that they would find us on the internet so they could harass us?
I worked as fast as I could asking bloggers to remove our photos and mention of us, but only one complied. By the end of the day, more than 150 sites had blogged about us. They were not saying anything overtly mean for the most part. The comments, on the other hand, mostly mentioned the “end of times,” beheading us if we came to Nigeria, asking God to rain down evil upon us, suggesting that we get anal cancer and die, calling us devils, and threatening us in various other vulgar ways. Some people commented positively, but they were in the minority.
David’s groomsmen were also accused of being gay. One of them felt compelled to come out via social media after the pressure.
David’s family was harassed by neighbors and local hooligans. He hadn’t told his family we were getting married. They were not even aware he was gay. David’s sister called to make sure we knew that she knew and she supported us. She relayed that his mom was not admitting anything and continued to defend David to anyone who bothered her. His other siblings also messaged us to say that they were being harassed via telephone, in person, and social media.
You might ask yourself why I would share this story.
You see, I fell in love with an amazing Nigerian man. I knew it was illegal for him to be gay in his country. I knew it was illegal for his family to know he was gay and not report him. I never thought that my tiny little wedding in
Rochester, New York to this man would go any further than between our close friends who were invited and maybe some of their friends.
David was afraid to come out of the closet to his family for so many reasons, some of which I recognize in my own coming out story. Telling my parents was very frightening, painful and tough, but they support me now. I grew up here, where letting someone know you are gay was tough, not illegal. Some of David’s reasoning can only be understood by someone who grew up in Nigeria or a similar country where it is illegal to be gay.
Why would this be such big news in Nigeria? I believe it is because the press still wants to vilify gay men and women. They want to show that the USA is a place that corrupts the morals of children and is a den of sin an iniquity. The current political election probably isn’t helping change that impression much. The mere thought of two men getting married is enough to incite vitriol from all corners of Nigeria, and other parts of the world still today.
We queer folk still have a lot of fighting to do. We may have thankfully won marriage equality here on American soil, but until it is legally safe for our gay, queer, trans, and gender non-conforming brothers, sisters, and family to live their lives as they wish to be in all corners of the world, the fight must go on.
Photo Credit: Luke Reynolds Photography / Huffington Post
Hannah Hof, where would you like to spend your eternity? Pls ask your self that question. Gay and lezbianism is against the law of God and man. Leviticus 20:13 now the law of man, I will like to take u to a law in physics which states that like charges repel and unlike charges attracts. In the situation whereby like charges now attracts and unlike charges repel, it simply means some abnormalities have set in. God almighty created man and woman and ordained them together, it’s neither man and man nor woman and woman. This illogical mentality has to be corrected. I want to believe you will gain one or two things from my write up. No insults pls. I pray the holy spirit will minister to you IJN. Thanks.
Kalu Japhet I’m not trying to insinuate (Correct word) anything
I’m telling you facts. Our people should stop these hateful mentality of kill them, kill them because it’s not the kind of sin you commit.
Must we wish them death because most of us dislike that act?
I can understand someone disliking the act, because I also dislike it just as we should dislike fornication when our reasons are from the bible and God. Then, should I say death to fornicators or scammers because I dislike what they do?
Our people should learn to engage this LGBT family and reason with them in love and common sense.
This attitude of shouting kill them all the time is very foolish to the least.
Everything we call sin is an abomination before God, not ONLY homosexuality.
Do you know why u are Christians, because you don’t live by law, but grace. In the Old Testament, adulterers are stoned to death. But in New Testament, Jesus asked the stoners, let anyone without sin be the first to cast his stone. You know this story, they all dropped their stones and disappeared.
You have no right to kill someone who didn’t kill. Why are we always professing mob killings, giving people jungle justice to people when we can hand them over to the authorities.
Most of us need mental development. Many things are wrong with us in the society
Can know the gay ppl as they first start taking offence and no one was talking to them
Stop lying .I’m Muslim and the Qur’an didn’t say anything about this.not killing or anything else.
Happy married life Mrs. David Ukre and Mr. Eric Shoen.
Oh im soo sorry. I stopped reading at the gay part.
Thanks for assuming im gay i geuss. But thats kinda weird.
Well ok then.. lets go biblical.
” ye without sin, cast the first stone “.
Im waiting
Florence Ataudo you made a comment and I have right to reply to it… why being offended??…. well I’m not one of the few… and I have right to my own opinion OK? I just asked you a question now is it hard for you to answer that so you know how it hurts….. this is same way homophobics has made many gay people commit suicide all cos of bullying and you think it’s right when he bible told us to love one another as ourself….. why must you condemn anyone when you know you’re a sinner? Tell me I’m waiting
Haha.. Florence Ataudo its well
you’re should take a chill pill and mind your businesses than come hear and lay insults on another.
Love is love….
I made Ma point, so take it or leave it. Truth is bitter like there say. N u mentioned something about you asking a question .take ur time n read back MA comment b4 u say anything.
Naa u knw. Abeggy
Who wedded them plz?
Allah ya tsine muku albarka.
Call a spade a spade and a spoon one. People will always react to a bad government but the post is on homosexuality which is condemable. This is the stage we are now, we have to face it. What is wrong is wrong
Warri fall our hands now, they’re totally last now, immagine a man marry his fellow man, God forbid.
Short of worlds to say here
Warri una don see am.. Evil dey happen for una land chai
Stop quoting scriptures and let people get on with their lives.. so judgemental..and hypocritical.. like you all live perfect sin free lives..jokers…
They no do introduction in Warri ? U0001f602U0001f602U0001f602
I agree with you thanks
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Anything for the money……God help us
Visa purposed marriage . Warri man can never be gay .
Agreed! I’m an American citizen and I feel like my religious views have been attacked just because something is wrong and I say it is. The Bible is the truth period.
Hahaha I still don’t know why you got offended ? You tried to pull me in being a gay and I was never angry lol
Jennifer Ukairo condemn them to death? Is that correct?because a lot of the people here are condemning them to death. Plus have you ever met a homosexual person. I have and when you put aside the fact that they are in same sex relationships (which I personally have no problem with) you realise they are people like you and me. They aren’t demons not have they been possessed by demons.
That man is doing it for green card
God go punish that warri boy
It’s in the Bible King James …..an other versions as well …you ppl need to stop justify this abominable act an realise it’s not of God
Jesus, is coming. Soon. This nonsense shall stop. Repent.
Amen my brother. Jesus, is coming soon. This nonsense shall stop. Blood Of Jesus !!!
Blood of Jesus, is dripping. This nonsense shall stop. He coming. The Lord, is almost here .
Godless generation. I guess my black brother is the “woman”!, for the sake of getting rich. He is not proud to be African. It is not proved up to today that one is born gay. They are just perverted and demon possessed. How on earth can a man use the other mans anus for sex….I imagine the smell of pupu… Very disgusting and shameful. It has been proved by several doctors that anal sex exposes to colon cancer.
Lol warri no carry last jor, he’s making his money in hard currency in a very absurd way.. Thats warri for u, sharp guys
Ladies make una no vex na… ur own husbands will come, or do u want to marry the warri gay man or the white gay man? Obviously ur answer is no.. so let them marry themselves na haba…
What more can I say…..#ThusSaysTheLord. God is not man that He should lie..
religious fanatics are the biggest problem for the peace in the world
Cos of money
Cancer Of The Anus Is Waiting For Them The Same Way It Killed One Ghanaian Gay Musician
Please Stop hateful comments please U0001f64fU0001f3fe
You shall know the truth n the truth shall set u free
God forgive them for they do not know what they are doing
What you’ve said make more sense than quoting any book…Bible or Quran
@pweety oge love. .sahara desert you mean? Girlfriend you are evil lol..
Lol…let forget bout all that.#ONELOVE!!
Egbami oo,what Am I seening with my naked eyes.
Hahaha bro perfect comment hahaaha U0001f602U0001f602U0001f602
Hanna Hof love ur comments , they will not understand , save ur energy for better things dear
sodomy, where are law enforcers?
I can’t stop laughing.am here to read comments.
Nageria money is 4 evrythn.i dnt see y u all burn
There are men , I mean plenty men that have anal sex with women . So there’s no difference tbh . And ooh I guess you don’t read much. Homosexuality has existed in Africa long before you were born . Read about it . 🙂
If you’re saying that from a biblical aspect then I guess fire would have to strike you first. How dare you condemn them and pass judgment on them ? If you were to die today (God forbid) will you make heaven ?? Answer this before you place such comments on here . God bless x
Shld I? If he were ur blood brother wld u post a comment considering that u both share a surname? Common be real here…this is a serious reality check! Are u on his side here?
They don’t want your handshake ma . Keep it to yourself . Jheezeee Africans can say and do the most . Yet with all out so called morals looks at our nation U0001f62aU0001f62a
Danny how can you call yourself a Christian and say God doesn’t bless them ? Are you God to know ? God is not a man . With all the sins you commit on a daily basis God still cares about you and favours you so what makes you think you’re better than them .
Shame upon you don’t waste our time reading your articles
Well said James D’Aviator Durojay
Abeg this our president rich may person Tay be gayU0001f602U0001f602U0001f602U0001f602any which way na wayU0001f602U0001f602U0001f602
The Almighty awaits these ‘re devilish non human
May the Lord gave mercy on your soul fool
And what alk these judgemental people are forgetting is that, the Bible says, all sins are equal in the sight of God. So be used a petty lier, a thief,murder , trans or gay….at the end, we’re all the same…
So examine yourself first!
What is your own sin?
Wat ever dat mistakes u happy do it, but remember dear is GOD
Gogo Chika-Okafor let satan bless you may thunder fire that mouth of yours you used for saying God bless idiot
you’re a very big fool and an idiot,go and marry your father and see your”right”from that angle son of the devil.The Lord Jesus is coming,you better repent,atase!
U0001f602U0001f602U0001f602U0001f602 Yes boo tell them. They are fools . ol’dirty as
you all should let them florush and sop quotting bible.let God be the judge on the last day
Supreet Kumar Arjun Jha comments dkh BC xD
chessboard sale offer
Supreet Kumar iska acc ka pics dkh
Ewww….There are men and WOMEN for a reason, dude.
@Joshua u are bringing Bible verse here
What does acts 15:20 says
Or ll you tell me that you have never had sex
You think thats a natural gift from God
Hell no you so going to hell too
Mr white Gold
Keep judging people like you are pure
You should mind ur business you ain’t paying their bills
Lol ha ha ha
people don’t wake up one day and say ooh I want to be gay now. no it don’t work like that. anyway why bother what someone else is doing. more important things in this world to worry about like raping, corruption and terrorism.
No this is their platform. They are against pastors. But promote gays… I followed them cause I thought they were promoting African values.
Lol……..thAt cOmmEnt kill mE…….
Gay marriage or abomination is an abomination of the highest order to God..those of you involved.. Pls repent!!!!! And stop all these atrocity
Homosexualism is an abomination
Gossip Mill Nigeria this is a very big LIE, no warri man will marry man, because warri when l come from all men like that thing too much man nor get that thing
The bible made it clear ..he who fails one law fails all the laws….so be it gay or man and woman thing it is called one thing. ..sin…and we all do sin so like the master said let he who haven’t done worst cst the first. Stone. ..me am not even with. A stone. ..so let’s see the saints here..
Am still reading the comments
Foolishly Fools. So how do u guys give birth if ur mama and papa should had fooled that way would u guys had been alive.Fool.
Wherever You Go,
No Matter What The Weather,
Always Bring Your Own Sunshine
Wish U happy Sunday… http://maxyboiz.blogspot.com.ng/2016/07/new-music-alert-maxy-boy-nwa-otu-drops.html?m=1
Lmao you are hilarious U0001f602
Go joan…no one ain’t paying no one’s Bill’s here
tɦɨs ɨs ʀʊɮɮɨsɦ,
Hot sperm …I don die with lafu oooo
Tayo Sunshine Akanbi Damilola Ademiluyi Ade Doyin Blessing Ren U0001f602U0001f602U0001f602U0001f602U0001f602U0001f602U0001f602 this comment!
JESUS IS COMING VERY SOON. ON THAT GREAT DAY WHERE WILL YOU BE.
Crazy act! Lust!
After the money, what else?
Be wise!
Dude you cray… Lmao
let me start with your ass preferable Hanna Hof
Thou shalt not wear a garment of divers sorts, as of woollen and linen together. – Deuteronomy 22:11
You sinner!
Listen girl We don’t judge gay and will never condemn them if they are nt Nigerians. In Western culture having two wives is illegal, in Nigerian culture being gay is also illegal and against our norms. This man is from a tribe where men love women so much, so we are disappointed to see him go the other way.
And u ended up judging tooU0001f914 smbh
listen…am not justifying being gay…buh we r christians….christlike…Jesus saved an adulterous woman…nd here u r saying gays shuld die…its in the bible…buh rmba we live in a new convenant now…one of love nd peace…rather dan preach hate…pray for dem nd show dem love…i know dats wat Jesus wuld have done…dat is christianity…love nd peace
Lolzzzz my belle dey pain o
Let God be their judge!!!
You people too dump.