The man shared his story showing just how he has been caught between the devil and the deep blue sea.
Below is what he wrote:
I am 32 years old and my girlfriend is 31 years old. We’ve been together for 5 years and now live together in a nice house.
Sometime ago, I had serious medical problems and she gave me one of her kidneys to save my life.
However, things have been slowly fizzling out and I’ve been feeling like we don’t belong together for a few months now. I feel like if I don’t make a decision soon we will be married and I will feel this way forever.
But on the other hand, getting a kidney transplant has changed my life for the better in so many ways. I feel like staying together is the right thing to do even if I’m not in love anymore.
I’ll never be able to pay her back. I’m so torn and conflicted and feel like I have to make an impossible choice.
If I stay with her, I’ll always feel trapped and in a loveless relationship. If I break up with her, I’ll forever feel like an evil person for dumping someone who literally put their life on the line for me.
Please Sir kindly return the kidney back to her and wait for the next girl you fall in love with to donate her’s to you … Man you are heartless to even say a thing like falling out of love after she has risked her life to keep yours what an ingrate you are.
Doesn’t make him an ingrate. It’s not like he went out & cheated on her. Maybe a very long time passed after she gave the kidney & started losing interest in her.
Shut up
He is ungrateful… He thought he was dying, so he took her kidney. Now that he is “living a better healthy life ” he know longer fear death… But, what he need to think about is, anything can take a turn… Be careful how you treat the person that loved you enough to give you a part of her.
well said
Ur acting as if taking the kidney was a choice he was dieing he needed it to stay alive hes always gonna have a connection with her she saved his life. He cant help not being physically attracted to her just like he cant help nearly dieing
Well where was his FAMILY???? Evidently NOT interested enough to give him a kidney!!!! Young Man you’re a SORRY POS????????? how dare you do this to that Young Lady. In my OPINION you used her to SAVE YOUR LIFE!!!!! AND YOU’RE AS PATHETIC AS IT GETS!!!!!
Would you want to be in a forced relationship?
Sound like to me you just there anyway to get that kidney if you’re in love with her now you wasn’t in love with from the beginning but know you will weep what you sow
Would u rather be dead?
Agree
Tru3 Moment!!!
Well said. But would uwant to be with someone who doesn’t want you?
Shut up !!! God does everything for a purpose and one of his purpose was making this man fall out of love. Your quick to always defend a woman but not the mans part. He obviously feels like shit and stuck in a trap, he did mention “he needs to stay but just loveless”. She’s obviously doing something on her behalf as well for him to fall out of love! Don’t just blame a man blame a women as well. How you figure why men half of the time leave their woman not cause he’s selfish because men can feel fed up just like men can fall out of love NOT ONLY FEMALES HAVE THE RIGHTS TO BRAKE UP WITH A MAN !! SMh , get it together !!
Right..No1 asked that question..how long after was the feelings he once had gone?Then after that..hell yall also got to understand some ppl are in ya life 4 a reason dont mean they are meant to be there 4ever..
So very true!!
Shut up, plz give back the gyal her kidney you’ll find someone you’re inlove and then that girl can give you he’s, you’re ungreafull kmft
Where is everyone’s common sense…because she gave him a kidney dont you force yourself to be with her…whose to say stuff didnt change in the relationship..AFTER the transplant…let me ask this…because they gave u a kidney should you have to put up with EVERYTHING they put you through after…no return no refund policy either… if he got the kidney through a stranger does he now owe more loyalty to that stranger than before..lol yall need to get out yall feelings and see reality..
Basically yes so true this is something she decided to do they will be better off as friends than to stay in a relationship that is not bound to work out and make th both unhappy
I agree with what you have said 100%. This man dies not owe her his happiness and if he went about it the right way I know in time she would understand and he greatful for the fact that he was honest and didnt just stick around bc he felt badly for leaving her. Honestly, I think she’s be more upset if he did that than if he were honest with her and didn’t waste the next 20 30 or 40 years of her life in a relationship that isn’t based on love. If anything she DESERVES to be told the truth by this man at the very least. I think he owes her that. Don’t waste people’s time. This woman gave you your life back…be honest ..dont go and take her life from her.
Maybe the 2 of them should separate to sort feelings out ..the old saying ..if you love someone let them go if they come back thiers your if they dont then that person never was from the beginning…somtimes being away from a person makes the heart grow fonder…this women giving her kidney to him is a perfect example of women with unconventional ? love for her man.
Facts
I agree to a certain degree. For me i ask this what changed in your relationship that now is making you fall out of love maybe it can be rekindled if you try. Now if you are feeling this way because your now healthy thenYour playing a dangerous game and karma is a bitch.
The point , is to b honest. If your trapped , it’s wrong, to keep yourself in this relationship, things will just spiral, into all kinds of bad things . Tell her how your feeling, and get in with your life’s. Even though she’s done a everlasting , great thing for , you , you have to tell her and b honest. Both of You together, should then decide what to do.At least the truth came out.
Being with “the right one” is not about “feeling that spark all the time”… it’s about staying constantly committed to finding ways to bring it back… loving someone and being in love are two different things. If you love someone and want to make the relationship work, you have to understand that feeling “IN love” comes and goes in phases (some longer than others) and you finding ways to bring that spark back will create days, weeks, months or years at a time of being “IN love again”.. if your ready to give up because “it doesnt feel special anymore” or “no sparks”, then you will never be successful in any relationship… you have to be committed to make it work in a long term relationship.
Agree
She gave you a part of her life so you can have a life to live. PS god is good
That’s right God is good all the time just tell her how you feel maybe she will understand and Life Goes On she will find her true love one day I hope
Dats rite
Yes
I agree! Thats pretty sad. I would be devasted but it happened to Jesus. We do it every day to him. Its pretty sad now He has fallen out of love really. And we wonder why people make changes in there lives mmmmm
First off all of you are stupid give the kidney back and die right gtfoh! 2 he isn’t ungrateful that’s why he is torn from the fact of him not loving her anymore 3 so he should stay with her and make both there life’s miserable that is stupid trust me if you don’t love her anymore she already know it homie from your actions give it a true shit try to remember why you love her. Try to work it out.if you still feel the same way step off. She will be blessed for the unselfish act she did. By having a wonderful beautiful king love her for who she is. You need to be that king or move out the way for another king to love her
Love this…soo true
Well said
Yaasss!!!
So true .I agree with u 100%.
Word love this
I agree 100%.
Well said
Not only is he selfish. That fool never loved her. He used her from the beginning. Had he not he’d have already married her.
How about she cut that kidney out and say she changed her mind she wants it back so she can fall in love with someone else.
????
I couldn’t have said it better!!!????????????
I agree return the kidney them move on…ok it’s only right. Men are trip you probably already knew you didn’t want to marry her before you accepted the kidney.
??
Yes yes..This is really sad. Did he ever love her? My goodness..???
Fuck up?!
I’m glad somebody was mean before me…I was gonna let him have it…smh..
Right!!!!!!!!!
Amen….Wys
It’s not his fault that the love isn’t there anymore. Granted she did something huge but people grow apart. It happens. I stayed with my ex and help his get through one of the worst car accidents and we still grew apart. He thanks me almost daily for everything and we both apologize to each other that things just weren’t meant to be like we both intended. It’s best to tell her how he feels than things lead to a marriage that will more than likely fail.
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Definitely agree
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If you know you tired of been with her please give the kidney back too her,you are really ungreatful human,oh now you are healthy and strong now u saying you tired of her,tell me when you were seriously illed why didn’t you mentioned it too your girlfriend that you tired of her now she has donated the kindney too you,you saying nonsense from you mouth if u leave her without given her back God almighty will punish you in million times na this kind people God dey punish,all you saying and thinking is rubbish, after 5years can’t you see men are wicked,the girl way u dey eye so why she nor donated her kidney give you,who one die but this girl scaraficed for you this boy,don’t do what you will ever in your life regret,if u saying you want too you can return her kidney for her that settles it all,think with your head.
He need to give her back her kidneys ….who the fuck are u too say u don’t love the woman who saved your life
In fact you are mad,you are the biggest mad man I have ever seeing in the entire whole wide world,ever mad man way dey eat for trash nor go think the way u dey think,I think you are frustrated this time around,get out you just been stupid of your self,abeg return the kidney back too the precious lady,you big mouth
Pls give it a second thought if she s ur sister and came home with dat story of her boyfriend leaving her after she has donated her half self wat would u do .pls relax as u fell inlove with her for the past five years u ll come ard again just like the old times bcos for her to stay with you when u re sick and go to the extent of donating her kidney she s special
I would try harder to make it work shes an excellent women to have done what she did for you .a bird in the hand is better than fishing around and not knowing what you will get.ijs
So true, anyone doing something like that for me, I would cherish that person more and more everyday…. Giving me a second chance, that’s a great deal, I wouldn’t trade that person for anything else in the world, no matter what
This is a very simple case, pls Mr ungrateful man, give the kidney back to her……can you imagine the nonsense you are vomiting with your mouth.
I probably want my shit back ungrateful bastard???
???
Yall I dont think once a kidney has been dont think it can be returned..I’m going to check into this. Because if you can then he should at least ask if she want it back give her the choice to say yes or no
What iam asking first is where are your parents relatives and your loved ones when this precious lady was risking her life to serve yours now that you’re back on track this is what you have in mind idont blame you such is life but think about it before making any mistake ican see you are ungrateful someone who has never said thank you to God almighty for the gift of blessings like that woman pls try it and see how the world is going to deal with you
When you leaving left mi kidney ??????????????
Well, this here is the wickedest thing I ever hear of. Firstly , give back that kidney and go drop dead. That woman’s feet you should be kissing and cherishing and loving ,with every molecule in you. I pray she was mine. You are not even the copy of a man. Lady whoever you are, God bless your heart
You should let her know, better break up than being in an unhappy relationship.
If she is matured, she will understand.
I have a kidney transplant, a kidney is not something you “give back”.
I got my mother’s kidney in 1985, and my family thought that I had to show gratitude to my mother every day after that.
That is not how that works either! When you decide to give away a kidney, it is not yours anymore. And you can’t force someone to be with you because she/he gave you a kidney! This guy is not doing anything wrong!
Only if he stays with her, that would be wrong! I am sure he will always be thankful for her sacrifice. But she might not want to stay with him either. If she knows he doesn’t love her any more. Sometimes love dies, get over yourselves people!
Fuck that!! Love is a not only a feeling, but a CHOICE!!! You choose to walk away or FIGHT for what you want!! You can choose to NEVER give up!! Just like she chose to give you half of herself because she would rather sacrifice herself and the REST OF HER LIFE, if it means she’ll have you in it!!! I’m not saying stay and be miserable, but really give it your all everyday! Communicat about Everything!! and never stop dating your significant other!!
Wow,
I show my mother gratitude every day of my life and she did not need to give me a kidney to receive it!
As far as this guy the reality is she improved his life by giving him something he needed to continue to live but it would be best he leaves because I often love to see those men who up and leave women who did it all for them because she will not only find a better man but one who will do the same for her!
Oh and he shall learned it’s a doggie dog world out here full of sneaky conniving people I say let him be great!
I️ agree it’s just an unfortunate case. I️ don’t think he is an evil person they just grew apart he never spoke any ill will of her so although she laid her life on the line for him why force yourself to be with someone who you’re not in love with and who knows if he tells her she might feel the same way. I️ don’t think he owes her anything they both knew what time it was when she donated the kidney she chose to make such a life changing decision and I️ don’t think that should bond them for life as to have to be stuck with each other and not be in love because the next step for him would be to cheat
Yes i feel the same way, Im sorry but if he aint happy Why stay dont make sense, Sorry My happiness have to come first, Its sad but life is to short to be with someone you dont love.
Give back what you took from her, simple. You’re just being very ungrateful if you now ‘think’ that you don’t love her again.
Give back what you took from her, simple. You’re just being very ungrateful if you now ‘think’ that you don’t love her again.
You are so ungrateful, man up.
PS.no one can. Judge you but god think about it.
Woow….this is a serious issue here…i would wish to say that man u have to make a wise choice.Look here,if you decide to stay with this lady u will make her suffer more than compared to when u are gone then her remaining kidney will fail to function,u will cheat on her ,u will despise her coz the motive behind your stay is PITY.I will suggest that u take sometime off being together may be 2-3 months, for 2 months think about it,weigh your feelings,if truly u don’t have any feelings for her ,take the last months to gain yourself some courage of breaking the news to her. Iam sure if she has been living without the kidney she will also be able to live without u coz u are not any important than her Kidney,she gave u her kidney out of her good heart,and due to this God will reward her courage and strength to live without u,and make sure u vanish for good,don’t even try to call to find out whether her 1 kidney failed or its still working.She will surely see God because she has a pure heart.
How do you think that she feel’s if you where in here shoes and she needed a kidney and brother I will leave it at that.
I think you need to sit down with her and discuss how you feel. You never know…. After discussing try to make things work on both sides. If still bears no fruit, you can decide to quit by both of you talking it out. I know it is hard but possible. Plus LOVE AIN’T JUST A FEELING, IT’S A COMMITMENT you make daily. Try and look for any distractions that may have made you fall out. If it’s her character, think out with her. Am sure you wouldn’t have stayed with her that long if you were not in love in first place. Wishing you all the best as pursue your desire
This is one of the best comments.
The act of her giving a kidney to you should be enough to keep you in love with her forever. You are the problem, whatever it is. Is she better off without you? Maybe.
Just give her back her kidney and go live a dead life .
Mr give the girl back her kidney Caz u are too heartless after she donated her kidney to u u do not love her again.wait for the other girl to cum an donate her kidney to u.
You punk ass no longer Sick with all sorts of issues…Have your strength , with her Kidney and all of sudden you don’t Love her, cause your Dick can stand up and you can go here and there .. No longer in out Hospitals ..Boy bye … Worthless ,peice of a Man!!??????
Might already be tipping on his tippy toes!??????? Walked up on something.
Boy she was committed to you, showed compassion, empathy and courage. Ask her how she feel about you now, do she still love you? Wait are you acting out on her because you Can’t repay her, educate yourself my brother; and remove those shackles that blind you to what newly empowering feeling you have. She sacrificed for your gain, she probably wanted to keep you all for herself; but the question is those commitment scares you. If she zogally I could understand but she literally kept you alive you so ungrateful again educate yourself my brother. More you keep beating yourself up not being able to pay her back the more better you will became, men hate not being the superhero get over yourself; better yet she should get over you, with your ungrateful ass get a second chance of life and this is the way you think (the f@@k)!
Now you not inlove with her dude just give her back her organ and the one you inlove with tell her you need a organ and be done with it..How dare you get that girl body part and dont love her any more that girl save your life and now you wanna leave her ohhhh hell to the naw naw that girl gonna be hurt hell she might take matters in her own ✋’s and take her kidney back from you.Dude if you gonna leave her it’s in your best interest to leave first then text her and tell her why
Give it back…or try to fall back in love…
If you don’t want her, you don’t want her kidney either.
suck it up.
Yup I’m dat order
Yup in dat order comments above..
She deserves better than you. End of story.
Wow! I’m always amazed to hear someone say that they “fell out of Love”. LOL, It just sound so ridiculous when you know the meaning of the word ” Love” as it is defined in its truest meaning. The one description of the word “Love” that sticks out in my mind is that ” Love never fails,” 1 Corithians 13:8.
True love will allow you to go past anything that you may feel in the natural or carnally because true love, hits your core, inner man -that spirit man. And THAT my friend is your glue that keeps you from crossing the border of no return. You were NEVER really “In Love” with her in the first place. You’re just saying it because it sounds good – to you! She, on the other hand, IS in love and has proved it by laying down her life for her brother.
Pray for wisdom, she doesn’t have a problem, You do! You could salvage this relationship by courting her and actually Falling In Love with her. Don’t give up so easily! Fight for her like she fought for you!!!
Nicely said!
YES!!! Love is more than that THRILL. You obviously cared for her if you have been together 5 years!! See a couples councilor and FIND YOUR WAY BACK!! A good partner is hard to find. Loyal, and giving when times are tough….hard to find, my friend. Don’t throw it away. Try recovering that feeling!!? Good Luck!
This comment is perfect. God Is love and he who knows God knows love. Well said
Give her her kidney back
Well well well….. this is such a difficult decision for you mate however my question to you is when were you having your lost feelings of not loving your wife no more is it before or after she give you the kidney ??? Because if it was before I think that you should have told her that you know longer love her before she decide to go through with the operation in giving you her kidney so by doing this you would have given her a reasonable choice to make with her kidney, if it was after the operation when she would have already given you her kidney then you are wicked “sorry to say” but i said it because that lady given you apart of her and you took it so you can live an now you trying to convince me that you know longer love her “wow” thats really though on her so I feel her pain not yours only because I dont think you really mean what you said cause if you did realise that having part of her an loving her anymore is going tobe hard on her why leave ??? Unless that is what you truely want but if you dont want to leave her because you think leaving her is not the right thing then i suggest you give each other space an start all over if that is not working then give her back what was given to you from her heart, If she decides to let you keep it then move on with your life and be your ex wife best friend ” just saying”.
They are not married.
You is no good you used her and you was feeling this way before she give you her kidney you dog ungrateful shit anyway she deserves better i wish i can tell her how u really feel abt her sissy fool
Your happiness comes first before anything, she chose to do that n u just hurting yourself
You guys are calling him selfish but what women wants to be in a relationship with a man that doesn’t love them?…..why be unhappy and waist time the greatest gift at this point IS to let her find a man that can appreciate the kind of women she is and love her unconditionally!….
Omg yes
They are not married.
He felt like that before the transplant, why now because you goin to live longer now…my opinion you jus used her wen yo ass thought you wasn’t goin to make it, you got so many men pretend like they jus this nice gentleman…you should have yo ass on your knees and be ready to make her your wife…she should jus leave yo ass with that kidney because God will bless her for wat she did from the heart you ungrateful mother fucker
Where you ever in love with her because you don’t stop loving someone after they give you a kidney
over a year passed. What’s the outcome of this story. Why there are never some update-articles that would tell how the story ended???
I am 31 but I didn’t donate a kidney, but girlfriend of this man if God has given you the opportunity to see this post, this man does not deserve you or your kidney, sometimes we just need to let these people ride their own storms and r.i.p. if it comes to that…If you in anyway feel guilty as a man ensure the woman gets back her kidney, thank her for the extra days she granted you, go on with your life until it is your time…This poor woman went through a risky surgical procedure with you and all u can think about is quitting? Not even to ask for advice as to how to relight the fire in your relationship, obviously you never loved her from day 1, too many women are being used by men only to be mistreated, hurt and then left smh…This must be one of your sick jokes…u r a wicked man
please. really? I am amazed and how this man has CHOSE not to love this women anymore. She obviously love him more than herself. You can live with one kidney,but what if something happened to the one she has left? The amount of respect is so small . I really think he needed a brain transplant instead of a kidney.
Seek guidance. Pray. Ask God for answers. Go to counciling separate and together. If you loved her once and you can love her again. Love and relationships take work. Love should be unconditional because people are forever changing. It is a choice. And the grass isn’t greener on the other side.
That’s right God is good all the time just tell her how you feel maybe she will understand and Life Goes On she will find her true love one day I hope
God would rather you be honest and not defile the sanctity of marriage. People have seasons in our life. If you hadn’t known her and you matched her and she donated a kidney, you can not control feelings
God warns us that the heart is a liar. You cant live by feelings or base decisions on feelings, you can only base it on prayer and the Bible.
It is bad that you dont think you love her after she gave her kidney to you. It’s bad if you arent honest with her, and how do you know that maybe she isnt feeling the same way. I guarantee that she knows something is up.
Why do you feel like you do not love her anymore?
Do you want her to have the best in life?
Would you lay down your life for hers?
Would you have donated a kidney to her? If so how would you feel if she was honest with you and told you the same thing that you just said?
There are a lot of arranged marriages that people dont love each other at first and then do.
Uncondtional love means that theres no one you cant love. Attraction is hormones anyway.
Do you maybe have a health issue going on like depression. Or ED? Does she have something going on medically herself?
Theres a lot to this for you. I’m sorry that you are in this position, but I have faith that you can work this out to a healthy solution.
I’ll be praying for you both
Ok I’m young but listen to me; it seems that if you leave you’re and evil person but the most you can do is sit and talk, try communication try doing things together with her try to find back love if that doesn’t work out really sit and talk tell her really how you feel she would be hurt badly but you both need to come to a conclusion whether it is you keep trying or give up on 5years. In the end you would know if you really love her but maybe for you it would be too late
Wow…messed up. Sometimes the grass seems greener over the fence but it ain’t what it seems. You will end up living in regrets. As for her, she will be fine.
You are a piece of shit you are very ungrateful. Need to give her her kidney back. Is that is what you need to do.
First and foremost, find out why you are no longer in love. 5 years? That’s worth figuring out why you are no longer in love. Ppl haven’t made it to 50 & 60 yrs of marriage because they’ve been in love all that time. They have fallen in and out of love over the years but fought to stay together and make it work. Go to counseling and fight for it. If in the end things don’t work out then you will have to go. No matter what, don’t stay in a dead end relationship.
Boy sit down and put yo night gown on.
Boy she could of lost her life for u.
Boy she loved u enough to live without.
Boy so just know you got a keeper. All women that Love u aint about to get cut open for that ass. So have a seat.
Nigga u stupid!
So what was the outcome of this story?
Man give her the kidney back that’s how I feel. U got her all the way fuck up. U selfish it ain’t nothing but u found ur self a new ass??? return her kidney pls and thanks…
Did you feel like this b4 she risked her life for you?
if he returns the kidney he die within 24hrs
Wow! SMH? Very very selfish!
Kill ur self??she gave u a big part of life just so u guys can have an happily ever after and now that you’ll all better u find out u are not in love anymore hmmmm???u had this taught way before u was just waiting for that poor girl to do the right thing so u can dump her??♀️??♀️??♀️Maybe u should just tell her the truth she deserves better than ur ungrateful as*hole looking ass n*gga.
I wouldn’t have given him s h I t.
Only this woman’s opinion. If it was me. I would want you to be honest. I gave my kidney out of love. I thought about all of the possible out comes even this. So I would pray you would be honest with me. Yes I would be hurt. You being honest, would mean you respect me enough not to bs me. And my hurt would go away. Because I chose to do it out of love. Not pity.
Give her back her kidney ?♀️
SUCK IT UP ASSHOLE OR GIVE THE KIDNEY BACK
Where is everyone’s common sense…because she gave him a kidney dont you force yourself to be with her…whose to say stuff didnt change in the relationship..AFTER the transplant…let me ask this…because they gave u a kidney should you have to put up with EVERYTHING they put you through after…no return no refund policy either… if he got the kidney through a stranger does he now owe more loyalty to that stranger than before..lol yall need to get out yall feelings and see reality..he only owes her the truth..the kidney deal is done
Give her kidney back and move on it die
If I was her I’ll tell his ass to give me my kidney back fuck he gone break up with me to be in another bitch face with my kidney hell nawl run me my shit?️
They need to be friends and go on with both of theyre lives rather than go into a Marriage of unhappiness what she did she did from her heart for him she may not be in love with him either! Wake up oeople it’s the Godky thing to do!
I think honestly even if your not “in love” with her anymore you still “have love” for her enough to be able to sit down with her and express to her your true feelings. Maybe she is feeling the same way? Just be very respectful and considerate to her feelings. If she feels you should stay with her and go to counciling than do so. At least you can say you gave it a valiant effort. If she’s feeling the same and the split is amicable than by all means. Bit At least your doing it together and not later if you happen to get lonely and cheat on her. Think just honestly tell her and ask her what she thinks. Just my opinion .
I did this for my “boyfriend” and we parted ways. Yes, his decision. We knew each other for 5yrs before the transplant, he got better, and it lasted a few years after, then it fizzled. It IS/WAS devastating, but like ALL things, time heals a little, but thoughts of that missing organ NEVER goes away. I no longer feel Whole in myself and have a complex about it, so I never tell anyone else and often feel I’m cheating them because of my self consciousness.
I’m a firm believer that it does not take someone 5 years to know that they love you and want to marry you! I’m willing to bet his current feelings were there long before now, and before receiving the kidney. What were you feeling towards her before buying a nice home and receiving your diagnosis? What is it about her that’s changed so much since receiving the kidney that made you realize you no longer love her? Again, willing to bet whatever it is was there very early on in the relationship. However, be a man and love her enough to leave-soon, please don’t drag this out. The worse thing you can do is stay with someone out of obligation! Recipe for disaster and much more! Seek God for forgiveness and understanding, not man!
First of all,,He is upfront and being honest. There are a lot of people who can not even recognize that they have a serious problem. The right thing for him to do is sit down and figure out why he does not have feelings fr her anymore and try to fix the problem. But if he can not fix the problem then he needs to come clean with her and express how he feels. Yes she is gonna be hurt, but at least he is up front with his feelings and not just walking away not caring. He admits that either way he is gonna feel bad because she put her life on the line. She chose to do a courageous life threatening procedure t save his life with her heart, I think she would have did the same for anyone. I think everyone should understand he is human. We are not to judge ones action but embrace his decision and hope he makes a good one. This is very difficult and sad. I how in the end she will understand if he is man enough to be honest.
I understand she made a choice, I also understand not being forced. What I dont understand is why you said nothing about counseling, trying to make things work, figuring out if it can be saved. Im sure she didn’t want to give you her kidney first…other resources more than likely did not work out and she went ahead and did it. If you havent even tried to work on fixing things and communicating your concerns, how do you decide its all fizzled out?
Listen. Everybody is entitled to choose who they want in and out there lives. Dont believe that u should have to stay with somebody that doesn’t make u happy . If ur not happy u will never treat ur partner with the full attention and love they deserve it will always be half ass, and that won’t do nothing, but make one another hate each other and that’s not good . I mean if u listen to what he said, he said as time went on his feelings started to change things started to fall out . Yes she saved his life ,but just cause anybody does something for u doesn’t mean ur being ungrateful or dont appreciate what they did for u by telling them the truth than having to live a lie. If things started to fall out all he has to do is sit and talk to her, and let her know how he feels just cause hes not in love with her doesn’t mean he doesn’t love her especially for what she did 4 him. Remember Communication is the key…
This doesn’t make him an awful person, if he stays with her and starts to resent her then he will start abusing her mentally and emotionally and spiritually and she will suffer. He should sit her down ,have a deep conversation with her and be honest. Being honest can be a new start or closure.i wouldn’t want a man to be with me if he didn’t love me and felt obligated to be with because I gave him a kidney, I’m sure she gave out of love but after the LOVE has faded and gone she still blessed someone with life??
The only thing i can say to you anonymous is you will literally never find another person who would love you so much that they would give their life so you can have life. That kind of love comes around once in a lifetime, once you have thought about that statement but you still decide to leave her, its alright because that is your choice- you are not bound to stay. Please when you decide to leave, do not look back. Let her find someone who will love her enough to give his life for her, she really deserves happiness in her life.
There isn’t enough information to give any advice. What happened that you don’t feel to love her anymore?
And, most important, how does SHE feel? A close relationship doesn’t just break from one day to the other.
Either you are a really good actor and live a role, a lie, for some time already or your partner will have noticed the problems.
What is HER opinion? Did you even talk to her yet? Do you think she deserves to live like that at all?
Man, this is a tough situation. You only have one life to live. And quite honestly, you have to think of your happiness because there’s no point in living a life of misery. Only you can control your life and your path to be happy. I understand the guilt. However, you can’t say he’s a terrible man. The guy seems truly conflicted because he values the person in some way. Some guys would leave without even thinking about the past. Things happen in relationships, people change, you never know what a person could be thinking at any moment. I say, maybe try to bring the spark back? Try something differently. Do new things together. Learn to love each other again! At least /try/. If your heart and your feelings still tell you otherwise, you may have to have a serious conversation. Try to make amends and never try to completely shut people out your life. Come to an understanding that things are just not working out but you appreciate everything she’s ever done for you. I’m sure in the near or far future you’ll be there for each other. Even if it doesn’t mean you’ll be married. Sorry if I sound like an asshole. Just sounds like a recipe for a bad divorce and a waste of another humans limited time and healing.
I understand that the kidney donor’s operation is much more dangerous and painful than the recipient ‘s. So after watching her go through that for you and your life, you desire to leave? Wow! You don’t deserve her! Walking away would be the best blessing she could have! You will be in the same situation one day and then you will understand why it’s happening to you. It’s called Karma! Drink it with lots of ice!
People…common sense…you cannot give someone their kidney back. Get educated…please my god! Lmao I can’t believe how many of you think that giving a kidney back is like giving back a CD or a piece of clothing. Smh if you aren t in love with her anymore do what anyone with sense would do. She gave you your life back, right? So don’t go and waste any more of hers by allowing her to stay in a relationship not built on love. Give her what she gave you and let her live her life the way she DESERVES. Let her go, you’ll be giving her, her life back in return. Things happen and people change but if she’s as good a person as I’m thinking…someone has to have a good heart in order to even think about giving you their kidney, than she will understand and be greatful you did it now and not waste the next 20 or 30 years bc you felt guilty. This has been about you the whole time…its time to make it about her. Give her what she obviously deserves.
YOU NEED TO SIT WITH HER AND LET HER KNOW HOW YOU FEEL SHE DESERVE TO KNO THE TRUTH BECAUSE NOONE SHOULD BE FORCE TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP THAT THEY DON’T WANT TOO REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOMEONE DONE FOR YOU I DON’T KNO YOUR REASON BUT IF YOU FELT LIKE THAT YOU SHOULD OF BEEN HONEST WITH HER YES SHE DID SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL FOR YOU BUT IT WOULD OF BEEN HER DECISION TO GIVE YOU HER KIDNEY ONCE SHE KNEW HOW YOU REALLY FELT AND IF SHE STILL WOULD OF GAVE IT TO YOU ITS BECAUSE SHE A BEAUTIFUL PERSON ONE DAY SHE WILL FIND SOMEONE THAT WILL LOVE HER SO DON’T STAY IN A RELATIONSHIP JUST BECAUSE YOU FEEL GUILTY TELL HER THE TRUTH BEST OF LUCK SHE WILL HOPEFULLY UNDERSTAND ALTHOUGH IT WILL BREAK HER HEART BUT SHE’LL FIND A WAY TO MOVE ON WITH HER LIFE GOD BLESS ?
Sooooo, is giving kidneys back an actual thing? Orrrr…
If you look at alot of kidney failure patients, most do not have relationships. I am one of them. When your kidneys are working (your iwn) kidneys) your last few is fuller as the kidney is critically important to your vitally. You can call this ‘libido’. It may be that your a cunt. Chances are your body is not as amorous as it once was with a foreign kidney in coupled with so many toxic, immune destroying medications. This happens breakup thing happens alot. You’re not alone. Hope this helps. You can still be friends.
You didn’t love her to begin with. If you were truly in love with this woman and she risked her life to save yours that will only increase the love you have for that person. The love you have for her would not have diminished after she risked her life for you. You knew from the jump you wasn’t feeling her like that but you didn’t want to die. This is the most selfish thing I’ve ever seen in my life. You should have told her how you feel and let it be her choice whether or not to help you. What kind of man are you?
My name is jarvis brown,and i would love to give her my kidney so she can have a happy life
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You need to let her know how you feel not being in love with her anymore. and then tell her why if you continue on with the relationship knowing how you feel about you only making it worst. but not only that thank her for given you another chance to live by given her Kidneys to you . you don’t won’t to be with her anymore but still got her kidneys knowing how you feel about her this is so sad.
Shit that woman put her life on the line for you . You better love her for life and not take that woman for granted. Because once she gone she gone, and if you lasted 5 make it 50. Don’t waste that woman’s time. Shit you already got half of her. Give her, her half. Be faithful be happy, have a family and grow your stupid ass up. Another bitch may be prettier than her on the outside, but on the inside impossible. She gave you something she didn’t have too.
He is not a bad person. People fall out of love all the time. Just because you feel like you should end things, doesn’t mean y’all can’t be super close friends. You guys are making it seem like he used her for that, when that’s not the case. He loved her, or he wouldn’t have been with her the past 5 years. People go through phases where they just feel like they don’t love someone anymore, but people also just fall out of love.
My first question is this have you even talked to her about it secondly did you feel like this before you got the transplant done if you felt like this before the transplant and you are in the wrong but if not you does she deserves you to talk to her about this don’t stay because she did something for you to save your life stay because you want to honestly I think you need to get help or counseling whatever and see what happens after that and if that doesn’t work or if you really don’t want to do counseling the new you and her need to do side that it might be time for you to leave